Prathima's Miles & Milestones

Ever since I was a little girl I’ve known that my relationship with my dad was special. He’s always had my back, always believed in my dreams (even when they involved things like going to the Wonderland-like in Disney movies, Sonpari or having a flying horse or becoming invisible for a day), and taught me that the only thing that stands in my way is ultimately me. There’s not a shred of doubt in my mind that the reason I’m the strong, self-assured, confident woman today is because I have a dad who encourages me to be nothing less.

The relationship between a daughter and a father is unlike any other on Earth. When you’re raised by a strong father it prepares you for life in a special and ultimately affirming way. The best birthday dresses, most beautiful cakes, the lowest math mark and signature on Report card, the school trips, all of these have been sanctioned by my dad. He’s my not just my ATM, he’s my treasury!

In my upbringing, I have seen him responding to situations rather than reacting to it. You see the way strong men treat strong women. You see what it’s like to respect others, regardless of gender or status or situation. When you’re raised by a good father, and you’re attached to him, his behaviour naturally rubs off on you. Because he leads by example, you follow accordingly. It starts with following the traffic rules up to your daily routine. You learn to carry yourself a certain way, to expect a certain level of treatment from the people around you. But you also always give it back, because that’s what your dad would do. Also, you don’t let people undermine you. He taught me stand up for my rights, even if it means standing alone to voice out. He also has taught me to apologise and ask for forgiveness if I am wrong.

The real strength comes from being multifaceted, from allowing yourself to have layers, from allowing yourself to be strong and soft at the same time. Being able and willing to be there for other people is a quality found in the strongest individuals. And that’s something I learned from watching my dad continuously show up for you. It’s not just about controlling the emotions. It’s even about the physical strength.

Challenges excite you. They fuel you. They don’t exhaust you or make you want to curl up into a ball and give up. Instead, they’re kind of why you get up in the morning. One learns from their father to wake up and face life — to never fear it. And it’s impossible to do that if you allow yourself to be intimidated by the tough things. You’re not intimidated by challenges because they inspire you.

When you’re raised by a dad who was constantly there for you, you know how important it is to do that for others. Eventually, it’s just second nature because to you, it’s just what you do. It’s that simple.

People make mistakes. Forgiving them is your power. You’ve made them yourself time and time again and your dad was constantly there with unconditional love and advice and forgiveness. Strength doesn’t come from hanging onto grudges and refusing to let go. It comes from being able to accept people, flaws and all, and reassuring them that they can always come back to you.

If you’re not afraid of challenges then you’re also not afraid of finishing what you start. You know how to persevere, how to keep going even when the “going” seems impossible. Strong fathers teach the importance of not backing down just because something’s hard. They teach you to put your chin up, hold your shoulders back, and keep on going.

One of the key things most strong people have is an even stronger support system. You know you have your friends and your family, especially your dad, in your corner whenever you need them. You know that there’s no merit in going through life alone, even if you’re technically capable. It’s better with the people who love you. It’s always better with the people who love you.

You never, ever settle. Your standards for your life, your aspirations, and the people you surround yourself with are extremely high. You don’t allow people to walk all over you, to take advantage of you, or to treat you in a way that makes you feel “less than.” You know what you deserve — you watched your dad lead by example your entire childhood. So you don’t settle. And you never will. The more you practice the luckier you get is been my dad’s favourite words. He always tells me to devote all your time towards practice and honing your skills. Join an ample number of classes which interests you, yet give your 100% to all of them. Do not slack.

You have a best friend like no other. When you’re close with your dad, you have a friend for life. He was there from the literal beginning and he’s the person you know you can call on whenever and he’ll be there. You have a sounding board when you need to talk things out, a shoulder to cry on, and someone to just laugh with whenever you need to. A strong father is a thoughtful leader, a good listener, and a great friend by example. And he raises you to be the exact same way.